The Art of Being Feminine

Sunday, November 15, 2009

How to Recognize Your True Soulmate

How to Recognize Your True Soulmate
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Based on a solid foundation of love, respect and friendship, each soulmate understands and accepts the others disposition and moods, as well as understands, accepts and appreciates the others personality and character - to the highest degree. In other words, it feels like it was meant to be! A soulmate also totally accepts you as you are – the good along with the not so good ;-)

This true acceptance of each other also means that they don’t have this great urge to change each other ;-) It’s also understanding and accepting that no one is perfect and the negative aspects in an individual’s personality is just part of being human! However, that being said there is no unhealthy manipulation, control or abuse in a soulmate relationship!

Each half of the soulmate couple boosts the others self-esteem, challenges each other and spurs each other on to greater success in life. There’s so much familiarity and things just seem to flow naturally, as they live, explore and relish life together. However, life still won’t be without its occasional problems and challenges, yet despite this fact, a soulmate relationship will still be quite easy, blissful and rewarding.

This blissful union comes not only from being compatible with each other on many important levels (like being two sides of the same coin,) but from also being dissimilar in the right kind of ways. Soulmates are certainly NOT ‘mirror images’ to each other (and how boring would that be?!)

Of course having a spiritual soulmate is far superior to just having an ‘average’ boyfriend or husband; and having a spiritual soulmate is far more than just friendship and sexual fulfillment. You are literally ONE and can experience your own ‘paradise’ together.

A soul mate is 100% honest with you and can communicate with you. Another way to recognize your true soulmate is he truly listens to what you have to say and gives you feedback.

A soulmate also understands you and encourages you. Not long after meeting your soulmate, you’ll notice that he wants to truly get to know you and understand what makes you tick. He’ll definitely not just be talking about himself. He’ll also get quite excited about your successes and feel glad about the new things you learn and discover.

This man understands what you really do need, as well senses what your deepest feelings and desires are. He actually seems to ‘get’ you - to the very center of your being. So only this particular man can truly satisfy you and help you to become the very BEST woman you can possibly be!

Your soulmate counterpart really does help to make you more ‘complete.’ Even though we can be whole in ourselves without a ‘significant other,’ with a soulmate counterpart we’ll be able to significantly grow in knowledge, awareness, wisdom and intimacy – together!

Each half of the soullate pair seems to fill a sphere – especially when each understands, encourages and brings out the best in each other.

More than just a boyfriend or husband, a soulmate will effortlessly SEE the unique beauty in you and gladly put you as the number one human being in his life - as his priority!

A soulmate boyfriend or husband supports your choices and constantly shows you ALTRUISTIC (un-selfish) love. He has a real capacity to love and support you.

He’s generous with his entire being; not just with his material possessions, but with his love, care, attention, time, affection etc. And, he’ll love and adore you passionately!

A soulmate won’t be afraid to explore the deeper types of feelings with their significant other and they’ll also laugh and cry together. He’ll also stimulate your mind and emotions, satisfy and fulfill you in so many ways.

If these things are not a part of the relationship you currently have, then you’re NOT soul mates!

I hope you enjoyed my article; 'How to Recognize Your True Soulmate!'

Related soulmate articles;

What is a Soul Mate?
How to Find and Attract Your Soul Mate

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Ps; Join 'The pretty Society.' This is a very special image course where you get the irresistible secrets of creating a super gorgeous 'red carpet' image. Click here; http://tinyurl.com/melinas-friends You can now take the very first steps on becoming classy, poised and elegant woman - in fact, you can learn all the finishing school secrets of a very charming 'high society' lady.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

How to Find, Attract and Meet Your Soul Mate

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To find and attract your soul mate into your life, to open the door for your soul mate’s entrance, first work on healing any emotional wounds and get rid of anything that keeps you stuck in the past. Moreover, become the person you’d love. You must also consider yourself worthy before your soul mate can actually show up.

In addition, get your life in the best order possible. You’ll need to take some time to work on your personal growth, spirituality, as well as learn who you are and what your deepest values are. BECOME the person you’re looking for!

You’ll also need to come to a good understanding about what is that you really want and need in life – and just as importantly, what it is that you want and need in a man. Also, make a big detailed list of all the qualities, traits, attributes and characteristics - physical, mental, emotional and spiritual – that you want and need in a man.

However, it's very important to stay realistic in your expectations and be aware that your soul mate may not turn out to be everything you expect him to be, or look quite the same as the way you envisioned for that matter. Some women have almost impossible and unrealistic standards in this particular regard. So, be prepared to be surprised!

In addition, be objective and determine what you top 10 core values are. List them in order of importance. These core values that you should hold dear are vital for your future happiness, and are also what your future man has to cherish too (his top five values matching up with your own top five values.)

And always keep this in mind; a good-looking, sexy and successful couple is not enough - without truly compatible VALUES your ‘love’ will eventually dissipate! So, take your time to think about this and make sure not to leave anything off your ‘ideal man’ list either (you can also have quite a bit of fun creating these lists.)

Now, I want you to ask yourself; how many times have you ever thought a man was your ‘soul mate,’ but eventually you found out you were very wrong? Alternatively, how many occasions have you projected an unrealistic fantasy onto a man who initially seemed to have potential, but in actual fact ended up disappointed you terribly?

So, take your time in getting to know a man while busy creating the type of life you want to lead.

You may want to do visualization exercises and love and relationship affirmations to find, attract and meet your soul mate, as well as pray to God about it. Ask God to bring you your soulmate husband!

Have faith and be patient that you’ll eventually find and attract your soul mate into your life and experience a true romance. Live your life fully, richly and enjoy growing and having adventures as a single woman - while your waiting. True love waits!

Even though, you may be yearning for the one to share your life with, in the meantime, honor being a single woman, as well as all the things you can do as a single woman.

Don’t ever become desperate for a man or a relationship (this actually blocks you from attracting your soul mate and puts you in danger of settling for inferior types of men.)

Finally, when you’re ready for a new relationship, you’ll only choose to date those men who look like they could be a soul mate. Any man that fails you and disappoints you regularly - be gone with him! You’ll not waste precious time with less-than-ideal or unlikely candidates.

You’ll also need to ‘test drive’ every single man you date – just to make sure of his character. Find out... Is he sincere? Does he have integrity? Is he generous? Do his words match his actions and behavior?

See my next post ‘How to Recognize Your True Soul Mate,’ as well as my ‘How to choose the Right Man’ series for more clues on what to look for in a man. You certainly don’t want to end up in a relationship that only imitates love.

Finally, do believe in love and romance and have a heart open to it! Also, believe and know that you can have a soul connection with another. Romantics won’t have any trouble doing this, but still need to stay realistic ;-)

Getting back to having belief, a cynical attitude towards life just won’t cut it! Cynicism never helped anyone find and attract their soul mate, or experience that ‘everlasting’ kind of love!
I hope you enjoyed my post; 'How to Find, Attract and Meet Your Soul Mate.'

Related soulmate articles;

What is a Soul Mate?
How to Recognize Your Soulmate

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You may also be interested in 'Using The law of attraction to Attract Love;' http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/06/using-law-of-attraction-to-attract-love.html

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Tuesday, November 10, 2009

What is a Soul Mate? Is There Really Such a Thing as a Soul Mate?

What is a soul mate? Is there really such a thing as a soul mate?

Well let's look at it from a Christian perspective by seeing what the bible says about ‘soul mate’ type of unions;

"So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, "this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh…. Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will cleave to his wife, and they will be one flesh…."

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How beautiful, significant and rather mystical these words are! From these words, and considering the fact that God has a divine Will, as well as a sense of destiny, it looks as if God did indeed create the concept of soul mates :-)

Even though not every person subscribes to 'the soul mate theory,' or even desires to get married (and there’s nothing at all wrong with that,) this may explain why many people who aren’t married lack a sense of completeness – in the physical, mental and spiritual sense. Perhaps, only a true lover and ‘forever kind’ love can bring one this sense of completeness.

As we find in the scriptures; woman was originally derived from man, as well as taken out of man by God. Therefore, it’s also in a man's nature to want to get this missing piece BACK! This probably explains why many women also feel that (deep down inside) a part of themselves is missing - or a part of themselves is actually out there somewhere, away from them, and so they'll be somewhat longing and looking for it.

Many romantic individuals believe that their ‘missing half’ or soul mate is walking around out there someplace - on the earth somewhere.

If destiny is on their side, perhaps it will be quite a few years before they finally lay eyes on the person whom they feel is ‘THE ONE,’ the one person whom God pre-destined to be their husband or wife.

Now back to what a soul mate is.... besides being a very unique and wonderful person whom you're spiritually connected to, a soul mate is a person you can just relax with and JUST BE with, as well as joyfully share your life and grow old with!

Here’s what Wikipedia says about soul mates and what a soul mate is; “A soulmate is somebody with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, and/or compatibility. A related concept is that of the twin flame or twin soul - which is thought to be the ultimate soulmate, the one and only other half of one's soul, for which all souls are driven to find and join….”

There’s also something that seems to drive many of us to want to love and be lived - deeply and completely. And, even though I believe in the soul mate theory, I also believe that we could actually have more than one soul mate in the world. Perhaps there could be numerous ‘soul mates’ out there for each person! It’s also true that we may never find your soul mate.

Interestingly too, a man and woman often desire in a mate those qualities and characteristics which they themselves lack. A soul mate will provide this to them! A prime example is that a man will be most attracted to a woman and marry the woman who’s almost opposite to him in temperament. Moreover, in taste and goals there will be an undeniable harmony - without competition.

They’ll also be able to bring something significant, together to the table; a ‘banquet’ gathered from varying interests and pursuits, and certain nuggets of wisdom, as well as the unique knowledge that has been collected from contrasting experiences and different fields of thought.

Actually, soul mates not only have something substantial to bring to the table, but can become an unbreakable powerhouse together - unified, felt and acknowledged!

Generally, there’s a lack of understanding and depth in the ‘common’ relationship or marriage. It will be primarily based on physical attraction/sexual passion and ‘having a good time’ as well.

Even though these are ideal components of any satisfying and fulfilling relationship, it's just not enough. And, the altruistic love, caring and steadfast devotion is often absent from the common relationship or marriage.

Of course, physical attraction, compatibility, similar goals etc, can satisfy a couple’s needs for a certain amount of time, but it’s often not enough to be permanently satisfying. Other requirements are needed to truly enhance and fulfill a relationship or marriage (I’ll talk about those in the next few posts.)

Only with a ‘soul mate’ lover can a woman achieve that sublime kind of relationship happiness and fulfillment. In addition, it’s a most precious opportunity to live authentically and grow spiritually. And, only a soul mate kind of relationship is a true spiritual connection that will stand the test of time.

Related soulmate articles;

How to Find and Attract Your Soul Mate
How to Recognize Your Soulmate

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The next post will be talking about how to find and attract your soul mate.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

My Boyfriend is On Adult Dating Sites and Looks at Pornography

Advice for Women Who's Boyfriend or Husband is On Adult Dating Sites and Who Looks at or is Addicted to Pornography....

A Follower's Questions;

I really loved the hard to get ebook, it was brilliant, and I love all your tips and advice. Please could you give me advice? The man that I have been seeing works away so we don’t get to see each other often due to his outside commitments.

I found out a couple of months ago that he had a secret email address where he had set up profiles and added lots of women from porn and dating sites, he hasn’t actually physically met up with any of them, he sees it as “fun” and “play”, but to me it hurts me very much.

I can't help but feel bad about myself that he is leering at these women and chatting to them. He always tells me he is very attracted to me, and that he loves me and wants to be with me. But he acts quite immature as has a fear of commitment. While he knows I am waiting for him, he puts me on hold and ignores me while he has some fun online with those women.

When I found out a couple of months ago I calmly, bluntly and assertively told him I wasn’t putting up with it, that I value myself highly, and if he wants to be with me then I would like to be treated with love and respect.

He could either carry on living in fantasy-land or have a real relationship with me. If he was going to carry on behaving the way he did, ignoring me to spend all his time on these sex sites, then I was going to move on and would leave.

He didn’t take me seriously as I have always come back to him, so he thought I was bluffing. But now it has been over 2 months and I still haven’t contacted him. He has been on my profile a few times looking at it and is probably worried that I have stuck to what I said.

I wanted to set boundaries with him and tell him what I would and would not accept. He is also my best friend and I love him dearly, but he needs to learn that he can’t take me for granted and ignore me. I have feelings too and I respect myself.

Please could you help me to look at the situation from another angle? If a man is prone to “escapism” and is drawn to sex sites and dating sites out of boredom, and pretending to be someone he isn’t when he is lacking in confidence in himself, does he get fed up or bored of this emptiness?

Is he just having a virtual reality fantasy? And what does this do for a man when he is looking at these women and chatting to them online?

Do feelings come into this or is it just to pretend to be someone else and escape from his other problems? Does a man look at these women and want to be with them, or does he forget about them and want to be with his partner and have something real? Does a man need a wake up call to realize that he could actually lose the woman he loves unless he stops living in fantasy-land?

I really would like to try and understand why men behave in this way, and if it is just something they do on auto pilot with no feelings attached to these women. I feel bad about myself and unloved when I know he has been looking at those women and chatting to them. He thinks going on his sites are “innocent” and “fun.”

What would you suggest I do? I’ve held back for over 2 months and not contacted him which he didn’t believe I would do, but I needed to set boundaries with him and show him that I meant what I said, that I deserve respect and to be treated fairly, and that if he wants to be with me the ball is in his court.

My Advice;

I'll be very forthright about this particular matter - it's time to END it with this guy. He's certainly not the kind of man you really want to be involved with, let alone end up married to! For one, he's very mixed up. Then there's the fact he's inconsistent and ambivalent. But most disturbing to me is the fact he appears to be a rather sneaky and dishonest character.

I do believe he has been dishonest with you because any man who has been exposed as having a secret 'online life,' as well as has an addiction to pornography, would most likely be open to, as well as highly tempted to actually physically meet up with the women he interacts with online.

And, it usually doesn't just stop with physically meeting up with the women. I'm guessing in 99% of cases, a man's 'harmless and innocent,' yet covert activities lead to something more. Either leading to having online 'virtual sex' or real life sex.

I ask you…. how could you ever really be able to TRUST a man who exhibits such sneaky and dishonest behavior? And, of course this male idea of 'harmless fun and play' hurts you very much! This is only natural considering you have feelings for this man and he tells you that he loves you. I don't know of one woman in this situation, who wouldn't be torn apart emotionally.

Personally, I'd be turned off by a man who frequents adult or porn sites (let alone who's ADDICTED to them.) I’ll also add that some of those adult websites are very disturbing. Unfortunately we're also dealing with a serious addiction here - just like alcoholism, gambling etc is an addiction.

Moreover, it's not an easy thing for a man - or anyone - to stop doing. Another fact is that an addiction will mean far more to a man, than the woman or any other significant others in his life, and this is really quite demeaning to you!

Also, many men who are addicted to these sorts of websites are actually contemptuous or misogynistic toward women (besides being rather lustful and salacious individuals.) They certainly won't be having any kinds of authentic feelings for these tacky women, and often they don't have strong enough feelings for the woman who loves them either. But please don't personalize this. Remember, it's more about HIM than you!

Unfortunately, it requires more than a wake-up call - it usually requires psychological help for a man to be able to break such serious addictions. This kind of addiction, as well sex addiction and any other types of male negative behaviors aren’t just things that just magically disappear one day. And, a man has to want help for his behavior/s and addiction/s - himself!

It also goes without saying that this kind of man, and situation is NOT good for any woman's peace of mind or self-esteem. And, unless a man chooses himself to go and find professional help he's a lost cause.

Thinking more about this situation, I am concerned that it could have already put your own your health at risk. Especially if this man hasn't been open and honest with you, and has actually slept with any of these tacky women! I would also be quite surprised if he hasn't already been secretly involved with at least one of these promiscuous women.

Women do need to be reminded occasionally that even if a man does want to spend time with you, it doesn't mean that he won't also be wanting to spend time with some other woman (or women.)

Just from reading this letter, I safely assume that this man you’re ‘in knots’ about is an emotionally immature guy too. Also, this is a man who's simply unable to positively ACT on the (conflicting) messages he sends you. His overall actions are showing that he has some deeply ingrained, negative issues about intimacy and commitment.

These sorts of issues obviously come from a man's childhood. It's also obvious by his actions that he's not willing or able to get in touch with his own feelings and emotions. Generally, with men like this, there's a lack of 'connection' between their thoughts, emotions, impulses and behavior. It wouldn't be easy being in this man's shoes!

Imagine, actually craving closeness, affection and intimacy with another human being, yet at the same time having an overwhelming compulsion to push that person and relationship away?! A woman who's willing to tolerate this kind of situation doesn't help herself or the situation at all! You did mention that you've gone back to him several times already too.

Unfortunately, if you go back to him again, and if you keep going back to him, it will only make the situation worse. I'll be totally honest with you, if you ever tolerate this kind of behavior from any man, he'll just devalue you and disrespect you more and more. It's also not good to make such a man believe that he has such a powerful effect on you either!

And even if deep down inside, this man you really care about really does desire intimacy and commitment, he's simply isn't capable of dealing with such intense feelings…. let alone create the authentic experience of intimacy and commitment.

So, in order to satisfy this need (albeit partially satisfy it,) he basically pushes you away while creating the very behaviors in himself that cause you to have to feel this need - as well as have to struggle with the same sorts of ambivalent feelings that he's desperately trying to feel - yet AVOID. Addictions are also used by similar people to mask their feelings.

This poor guy certainly fits the 'commitment-phobic' type of man who despite wanting to experience feelings and intimacy, has a real aversion to it - and simply isn't capable of taking it to the next level. I'll mention too, that emotionally healthy men don't demonstrate these sorts of self-sabotaging behaviors, and are not usually addictive personalities either.

Sincerity also comes into this. Sincere men will not even bother fueling a situation with a woman that they know isn't going to end up going anywhere. Their consciences also wouldn't allow them to keep a woman in an indefinite 'limbo land' with them.

A genuine man who's truly a woman's 'best friend,' and who's confident and knows who he is, and what he wants, wouldn't need to escape, or keep a woman dangling on the end of a perpetual string.

And, ask yourself…. what sort of best friend would be fine about keeping you feeling constantly confused, or causing you to feel frustrated, rejected, off-center, crazy and desperate to know where you stand - as well as what the heck is going on??

Moreover, if a man truly has feelings for a woman and wants something more, he'll commit to her fairly quickly - usually within the first 6 months. There are no great difficulties or hurdles to deal with. He's also faithful and monogamous - if he's a man of character and integrity. This integrity also means that he won't be in a habit of telling the woman who cares for him lies.

Unfortunately, if you stay with this one, it's going to remain a situation of all TALK and nothing significant. In fact, a transient, shallow and rather maddening type of relationship will be as good as it gets! I can see too, that this guy doesn't really respect you and already takes you for granted. I'm also assuming that he's fairly confident of you going back to him again - and almost certainly thinks you will.

This kind of frustrating man is sure to end up causing any woman a broken heart. Yet, despite some men’s flaws and rather maddening behaviors, they can still be easy to fall in love with! However, if you really do respect and value yourself, you won't even entertain the idea of going back there.

The reality is, if you DO decide to go back, you'll be going back to losing your sense of self-respect, your sense of harmony and balance, your sense of serenity and contentment, as well as going back to trying to figure out every moment with him!!

If you were in an ideal relationship, with an ideal man, you wouldn't ever be forced to have to look at a relationship as a sort of 'project' either. Let alone having to deal with constant relationship problems or having to struggle against a man's behavior and ambivalence (which admittedly can be enthralling to some women!)

The simple fact is that this man isn't offering you the relationship you deserve. That fact alone should be enough to disqualify him. Mourn the loss of this particular man if need be. You'll then leave yourself open to all those men who DO desire love, commitment and intimacy! You now have a choice. Which road are you going to choose to take?

Finally, when you finally understand that it's not HIM you really want, but that what you're really wanting is a mutually fulfilling and satisfying relationship, one that's full of honesty, passion and devotion, that's when everything will start to click into place for you.

I hope that after thinking about it some more, you'll come to the conclusion that this man isn't 'THE ONE.' He's certainly not what we women would call 'dream material' and it's also pretty obvious that this guy can't and won't ever be able to fit into any healthy ideals of love and intimacy. The ball is now in YOUR court my dear! ;-)

There are countless women out there who really need to learn how to set up boundaries in their personal lives, as well as distance themselves from those individuals who fail them and are simply not worthy of them!

The next step involves taking the time to heal themselves, as well as to get themselves in order - before they even go on the lookout for another man (who actually has the capacity to have a healthy relationship.) This is so they can truly move on. Good luck!

You may be also interested in the following articles;

Is My Boyfriend Using Me?

WHY You Should Be Hard to Get

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Tuesday, November 3, 2009

How to Feel Good about Your Body - Positive Body Image Affirmations

How to feel Good About Your Body and Learn to Love Your Body - With Positive Body Image Affirmations

Positive and uplifting body image affirmations can definitely be effective in creating a more positive body image. You may not believe these affirmative statements at first, but just KEEP on saying them. Repeated enough, they'll eventually sink in to your subconscious mind!

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Doves.... they say that 'beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.' Yes? Well, YOU should be the first beholder whose beauty lies in her own eyes! Remember too, beauty is a subjective thing.

Positive body affirmations and self-talk can really change the way you feel about your body, as well as help to vastly improve your body image. Affirmations are especially powerful when used with determination and enthusiasm - EVERYDAY.

In addition, it’s ideal to utilize these affirmations while looking at yourself in a mirror. You can also put these body affirmations anywhere at all where you'll see them often. Simply read them and say them to yourself - as often as possible. You can learn to love your body :-)

*Tip; always be kind and compassionate towards yourself, and be careful what you say about yourself. Don’t say anything to yourself, that you wouldn’t ever say to your best friend! Focus on the nice and good things about your body - and stop giving attention to the not-so-good things about your body.

In addition to that, NEVER mention your body flaws to a man. The reality is that he probably won't even notice - unless you bring it up. Let your man see that you're a woman who loves and accepts her body - just the way it is! And, think about this.... if YOU can't or won't accept yourself the way you already are, then why should a man?

I tell you doves, there's often nothing more attractive than a self-confident woman - who's 'perfectly imperfect' and is still confident ;-)

Another thing that many women need to stop doing is comparing themselves to other women! Remember, there will ALWAYS be some other woman who's better looking than yourself - even if you are downright gorgeous! The truth of the matter is that looks aren't everything, and are not the only deciding factor in how attractive and desirable you are.

Many other aspects will be taken into account to determine a woman's level of desirability. And, even a 'plain' or average-looking woman can be perceived as beautiful and desirable because she has;

An alluring femininity
Confidence
An awesome character
A cute sassiness
A kind and loving heart
A certain way of carrying herself
A scintillating personality
A lovely smile and a sparkle in her eyes
A wonderful sense of humor
A clever intellect or a fascinating mind
A powerful charm and charisma

Moreover, the body changes and you won't always look the same. You won't always BE the same person either. Most importantly, you are NOT just your body. You're also not your breasts, your legs or your behind!

Also, the ideals of beauty are changing all the time - there's really no such thing as a universal 'perfect' ideal of beauty - as beauty is subjective - and no two people will ever totally agree on what's deemed as beautiful.

'Beauty (according to men) is never something that's FIXED either. Almost every man has his own preferred physical 'type' of woman ;-)

Some men like very slim and athletic women, while other men prefer the more soft, curvy and 'voluptuous' type of women. And, there's a hoard of men who are attracted to over-weight or obese women (often referred to as 'BBW,' and this acronym stands for 'big, beautiful woman.')

Though, that being said, we can't ignore the fact that obesity (especially morbid obesity,) is NOT a healthy condition - for anyone. So, obesity is something that can't be ignored, and no woman should ever delude herself about this or bury her head in the sand - in order to avoid the fact.

If you are obese, even if you feel healthy NOW, the future consequences to your health are undeniable. And, the negative changes happening to your body functions, as well as to your internal body organs will be already starting to happen (and that refined sugar and those unsaturated trans fats are like poison to the body!) Also, a woman's mental and psychological condition just can't be working optimally if she's clinically obese.

Sadly, many women have an endocrine imbalance or a thyroid disorder and aren't even aware of it. Problems with your endocrine glands or thyroid gland can play havoc with your metabolism and weight. If you're over-weight (despite eating healthily and exercising regularly,) and you've never had your thyroid levels checked - get them checked NOW!

If it's found during the lab tests that your thyroid levels are too low, luckily, there's a wealth of medical specialists, weight-loss experts, websites and books out there that can help you feel better, as well as lose weight.

Now, back to the positive body affirmations.... in addition to using this particular list, also pick out the individual features and parts of your body that you really do happen to like. Then, write some positive, reassuring and uplifting affirmations about THOSE as well!

Here's a few examples to give you an idea;

I have very pretty eyes

I have beautiful fingernails

I love my soft and dewy skin

I have nice feet

I love the way my hair shines

*What other parts of your body do you like?

My List of Positive Body Image Affirmations

I feel comfortable in, as well as good about my body

I have a good relationship with my body

I love the body that God gave me

I love and embrace my body completely

I look at my body’s reflection in the mirror with kindness, positivity and acceptance

I now make peace with my body

I treat my body in a caring and nurturing manner

I accept and feel positive about my body - just as it is

I am beautiful and desirable - just the way I am

My body is 'imperfectly perfect' - just the way it is

I love and accept every inch of my wonderful body – as well as my body's flaws and imperfections - they make me unique – and unique is good!

Today I stop comparing my body to other women

I honor my unique feminine beauty and know that beauty is not a size or weight

I am thankful that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that I know I am beautiful

I feel comfortable and at ease with my body's appearance

I take good care of my body’s needs - and myself

I appreciate my body's ability to heal and improve - and trust that ability completely

I rejoice in the miracle of my fully functioning and healthy body

I am grateful for all the well-functioning parts of my body

I am grateful for the functions of my body working with ease

I am thankful for being able to see, hear, taste and touch

I am thankful for my energy, mobility and strength

I am filled with wonder for all the capabilities that my body lets me perform

I am filled with wonder at the divinely created perfection of every cell of my body

I am filled with wonder that my body's performance is simply a projection of my beliefs about myself

I am becoming more healthy, vital and energetic every day

I deserve to have a healthy, fit, slim and beautiful body

Each day I get trimmer, fitter and more in shape

Each day I am closer to my ideal weight

Getting trim, toned and terrific is easy for me

Curves are feminine, sexy and beautiful

Men love curves on a woman

For every thin woman there's a man who loves thin women

For every curvy woman there's a man that loves curvy women

Beauty comes in all colors, shapes and sizes

Today my health and well-being is my top priority

Today I really enjoy eating fresh, healthy and nutritious food

Today I am eating smaller and more frequent portions

Today I really enjoy moving about and exercising

I make regular time for relaxation and unwinding

I feel great when I take the time to take good care of myself

I am a beautiful and desirable woman who feels good about my body's appearance

I am growing more beautiful, feminine and alluring everyday

I appreciate the admiring glances I get for my body's appearance

I graciously accept and am thankful for any compliments I receive about my body

YOU ARE ALREADY BEAUTIFUL, OH YES YOU ARE!

You may also be interested in; 'The Water-rich Diet;' http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/05/water-rich-diet-for-perfect-health-and.html

And; 'The Feminine Art of Confidence program; The Feminine Art of Confidence Program

Ps; Join 'The pretty Society.' This is a very special image course where you get the irresistible secrets of creating a super gorgeous 'red carpet' image. Click here; http://tinyurl.com/melinas-friends You can now take the very first steps on becoming classy, poised and elegant woman - in fact, you can learn all the finishing school secrets of a very charming 'high society' lady.

You may also be interested in;

Thursday, October 22, 2009

The Power of Affirmations and Positive Self Talk

Improve Your Self-Image and Life by Utilizing the Power of Affirmations and Positive Self Talk

Various thoughts are constantly weaving themselves together in a woman's mind - and she's either predominately thinking neutral or positive types of thoughts - or her thoughts are predominately of the negative type (most of us are somewhere in the middle.)

In addition, if a woman's thoughts are mainly of the negative type, much of the time she'll also be overwhelmed by feelings of pessimism and self-doubt. Unfortunately, not enough women are really aware of the type of thoughts they're mostly thinking (self-talk.)

In addition, if their self-talk is mainly negative, and they keep saying negative sorts of things to themselves (especially about themselves,) they'll eventually start to BELIEVE them.

It can be really discouraging for a woman to be plagued by these kinds of thoughts. It's not so pleasant for the people around her either - especially if negativity is a big part of her daily life.

However, there's a solution for changing the negative tide of your self-talk. The solution is using positive self-talk in the form of AFFIRMATIONS to counter any negativity - as well as to overcome those nagging, self-defeating and anxious thoughts.

Affirmations can be applied to any area of your life and are basically positive statements (in the form of self-talk) that can 'reprogram' a woman's mind into being a more positive and optimistic one.

*Tip; keep your affirmations short and very specific. In addition, always write and state your affirmations in the PRESENT TENSE. Example; 'I am now...' The more you write and say them out aloud, the more they will imprint them selves into your subliminal mind.

You can write your desired affirmations down in a private journal and choose to read them morning and night. You can also write your affirmations down on those little sticky notes and put them up all over the house, where you'll see them often! Or, you can pin some affirmations up on your mirror, and whenever you see them, say them out aloud while looking at yourself in the mirror :-)

Whenever those negative and self-defeating messages come into your mind, you can also counteract them by utilizing the power of affirmations and positive self talk - that will state the positive - without surrendering to the negative.

Doves, you certainly don't ever want to be surrendering to, or accepting any types of negative self-talk - for not only can it be extremely damaging to your self-esteem, but also cause you to be sabotaging your goals.

The power of affirmations and positive self-talk is strong indeed (and works best when you're most relaxed.) They work either by repetitively planting positive beliefs and outcomes into your subliminal mind, and by replacing any limiting, self-doubting, unkind or pessimistic thoughts with positive, healthy and affirming ones.

Positive affirmations and self-talk also assists you in moving TOWARDS your goals - with faith, trust and belief - instead of moving you further away from them. You also have the choice right now to respond to any future negative thought, message or statement - by replacing it immediately with with positive, motivating and uplifting one.

In time (and with perseverance,) it will become a HABIT to think in a positive and affirming manner. Moreover, you'll not only start to believe in yourself a whole lot more, but you'll also find that your thoughts will be predominantly positive :-)

However, you need to be consistent in using your affirmations. Keep using them and in a short amount of time (about two weeks or so,) you'll start truly believing them. The new beliefs will be imprinted in your subconscious mind, and that's when real results start being experienced!

Now, ask yourself the following questions;

Are your thoughts mainly of the negative kind?

Do you put yourself down a lot or call yourself derogatory names?

Have people told you that you need to be more positive?

If you answered 'yes' to any of these three questions, you really need to start turning the tide of your thoughts around! I'd suggest that you start monitoring your thoughts very carefully and the MOMENT you have a negative or self-defeating thought, counter it immediately with a positive and motivating statement.

When you realize you’ve been saying a lot of negative, defeating and unkind things to yourself, about yourself, simply turn it around in your mind. You might counteract the negative thought by say something along the lines of;

“That’s not true at all! I do plenty of things right!"

"It’s true I make mistakes, but so does everyone!"

"I try my best. That’s good enough!”

Once you start consistently replacing your negative self-dialogue with positive affirmations and self-talk, you may suddenly realize just how much your negative thinking has been interfering with your life, as well as sabotaging your goals!

Finally, if you are interested in a computer PROGRAM that can re-program your mind with new positive beliefs and subliminal messages, as well as give you unstoppable confidence, please feel free to check out my 'The Feminine Art of Confidence program.' You can see it there; The Feminine Art of Confidence Program

You may also be interested in positive body affirmations; http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/11/how-to-feel-good-about-your-body.html

Ps; Join 'The pretty Society.' This is a very special image course where you get the irresistible secrets of creating a super gorgeous 'red carpet' image. Click here; http://tinyurl.com/melinas-friends You can now take the very first steps on becoming classy, poised and elegant woman - in fact, you can learn all the finishing school secrets of a very charming 'high society' lady.

You may also be interested in;

Monday, October 19, 2009

The Art of Being a Lady

Definition of a Lady;

1. A considerate, dignified and well-mannered woman who has high standards of behavior – even in our often 'classless' society.

2. A woman who is rather refined in the mental or spiritual sense, who is also fitted by the poise, manners, habits and sentiments - witnessed in the upper classes.

3. A proper, virtuous and kind woman who naturally behaves in ladylike fashion.

4. A upper-class woman who is head of her house.

Kersti Bergroth; “The former concept "lady" meant also beauty. Not the beauty of features or clothes, but a graceful behavior coming from self-control. A lady is not loud-voiced, her laughter is not shrill, she moves freely and peacefully. Everything in her is beautiful even when she is homely….

The ideal of woman has become somewhat hard and "efficient.” Perhaps this will be once overcome when a real lady steps forward, in her refined and composed brilliancy.”

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ One Man’s Confusion About Today’s ‘Modern’ Women;

“What is with women these days? I used to think they were nice people that I couldn't understand, but agreeable and mostly friendly and smiled a lot, and you could dance with them. Lots of them were bright and funny. Most were pretty which, and made the world a pleasanter place. A guy could talk to women in those days, and it was kind of fun to be nice to them. All in all, I thought they were a splendid idea.

What happened?

Now when I talk to beings of the lady variety, they can't go five minutes without saying something hostile. They can't control it. A man doesn't have to provoke it. If a gal mentions her daughters, she has to let you know that she is raising them "not to need men," and her voice sounds like she had just found an earthworm in her mouth. Gee, thanks for sharing. Then she works in the story of her girlfriend who was mistreated by her husband”- Fred Reed

Lady Quotes;

A lady is a woman who makes a man behave like a gentleman - Russell Lynes

You may be a princess or the richest woman in the world, but you cannot be more than a lady - Jennie Jerome Churchill

Your dresses should be tight enough to show you're a woman and loose
enough to show you're a lady - Edith Head

The more you act like a lady, the more he'll act like a gentleman - Sydney Biddle Barrows

The attributes of a great lady may still be found in the rule of the four S's; sincerity, simplicity, sympathy and serenity - Emily Post

Thoughtfulness for others, generosity, modesty and self-respect are the qualities which make a real gentleman or lady - Thomas H. Huxley

Truth is a demure lady, much too ladylike to knock you on your head and drag you to her cave. She is there, but people must want her, and seek her out - William F. Buckley, Jr

A state can no more give up part of her sovereignty than a lady can give up part of her virtue - John Randolph

My mother taught me to treat a lady respectfully - Chris Brown

When a young man complains that a young lady has no heart, it's pretty certain that she has his - George Dennison Prentice

With men he can be rational and unaffected, but when he has ladies to please, every feature works - Jane Austen

Miss Manners cannot think of a more succinct definition of a lady than 'someone who wants to punch another person in the nose, but doesn't' - Judith Martin

A lady, that is enlightened, cultivated…. the only kind to be in a time of increasing classlessness - could espouse any cause - Virgilia Peterson

What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it - Brigitte Bardot

Some things a lady doesn't tell - Kim Hunter

My mother told me to be a lady. And for her, that meant be your own person, be independent - Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Once upon a perfect night, unclouded and still, there came the face of a pale and beautiful lady. The tresses of her hair reached out to make the constellations, and the dewy vapors of her gown fell soft upon the land - Kit Williams

I'll be a wife and mother first, then First Lady - Jackie Kennedy

Ps; Real gentlemen prefer lady-like women ;-)

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Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Win Two of My 'Feminine Arts' Products - Competition

The lucky winner of this competition is Jamie Lee Ligan. Congratulations dove! :-)

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

The Pretty Scent of Violets - Homemade Beauty Recipes

The Pretty and Feminine Scent of Violets

I know that our personal preferences in fragrance can be quite an individual thing, and what one women particularly enjoys in fragrance or perfume won't necessarily be enjoyed by another woman. Interestingly, each generation of women seems to have its chosen favorites in perfume as well. The women of the 19th century happened to adore soft and floral fragrances - such as rose and violet - and they adored it as much as they did their silk stockings, hats and dresses!

From the time a young girl first experienced the soft fragrance of her mother’s powder puff as it fluffed about her delicate neck, she came to adore those soft and feminine scents. And, what’s really changed? Feminine women today still adore pretty and feminine scents, as well as other sensual things. Even a woman’s linens and handkerchiefs can be made to emit a pleasant and sensual fragrance - sending forth into the environment some kind of pleasing scent.

Personally, when it comes to floral fragrances, my own favorites are frangipani, rose and jasmine. Gardenia and sweet pea are particularly enjoyed by me as well. Occasionally though, for a change, I'll include the pretty and feminine scent of violets in my bathing regime.

*Tip; there’s a real secret to enjoying your favorite feminine fragrance. It’s simply choosing one or two of your favorite 'signature' fragrances - and using them in every possible way!

The unique scent of the pretty purple violet is rich, sweet, powdery and rather earthy. In the nineteenth century, the women of those times loved to use this particular scent between the folds of their gowns. They also liked to place violet sachets in the crowns of their hats - which was quickly removed, once the gown or hat was to be worn. In later times, no lady of 'quality' would ever venture outside her home without wearing some kind of violet arrangement.

Even in modern times, many women still favor the pretty scent of violets and some actually consider it as having a strange drawing power. And, ‘Bois de Violette’ and ‘Apres L'Ondee’ are two very popular violet-based fragrances that are available to women today. Also, violet-scented bath soaps and body lotions are still a much loved favorite for adding to our personal galaxy of sweet feminine odors.

In addition, a few drops of violet essence (or any other fragrance oil/essential oil,) can be added to scent your face or body powder (if it’s not already scented,) and bath bags containing a little essence of violets can also be quite lovely. For those of you who happen to be quite fond of the scent of violets, I'll share with you the following homemade beauty recipes;

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Violet Milk Bath

3 cups of powdered full cream milk
1/3 cup of almond meal
1/3 cup of cornstarch
1/4 cup of dried orris root (orris root has a soft violet scent)
1/4 cup oatmeal
Optional; a few drops of violet fragrance oil.

Combine all of the ingredients well. Store in an air tight container.

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Floral Violet Sachet (for scenting linens)

Half a pound of dried and crushed rose leaves
Half a pound of dried Orris root
Optional; a few drops of violet fragrance oil

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Violet Bath Bags (for luxury bathing)

Cheesecloth
String or ribbon
Two pounds of finely ground oatmeal
Three ounces of cornstarch
One cup of grated castile soap.
A quarter of a pound of powdered orris root
Optional; a few drops of violet fragrance oil (additional fragrance is not essential though as orris root has a similar smell as violets.)

1. Mix ingredients thoroughly in a clean bowl.

2. Take one yard of cheese cloth and create little four inch squares.

3. Fill the cheesecloth squares with the bath mixture (though, larger bath bags can be made if preferred.)

4. Tie up the tops of the bags with ribbon or string.

**When using in the bath, these bags will make a soft white lather.

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Cleopatra Jasmine Body Lotion - Homemade Beauty Recipe

Home Made 'Cleopatra Jasmine Body Lotion' for Beautiful, Soft and Divinely Scented Skin

The beautiful and seductive fragrance of the jasmine flower (often being referred to as the 'queen of flowers') is much loved by French women. Even Cleopatra herself was said to have especially chosen the scent of jasmine to captivate Marc Antony.

Moreover, King Louis XVI had a real thing for its alluring scent, having quite a preference for jasmine scented sheets. In fact, many men seem to be positively affected by the scent of jasmine....

So, here's a lovely jasmine body lotion recipe for you doves. This lotion will give you such soft and silky skin - and retains the moisture in your skin. In addition, you can use it as a hand lotion. It's rich, creamy and smells oh so divine!

The scent of jasmine is certainly one of my personal favorites in perfumes. Jasmine essential oil has many therapeutic properties too - in this particular case rejuvenating the skin, as well as encouraging new cell growth. It's also a renowned aphrodisiac and can help to increase a man's feelings of attraction and desire towards you ;-)

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Cleopatra Jasmine Body Lotion

Ingredients;

1/4 cup apricot kernel oil
1 tsp. Coconut oil
1 tbs. Cocoa butter
1 tsp. Beeswax
1 tsp. Aloe Vera gel
1/2 tsp. Glycerin
1/4 cup distilled water/rose water/orange water
3 drops jasmine pure essential oil (can be 3% in carrier oil)

Instructions;

1. Take your cocoa butter and oils and blend them together over a low heat. Allow to cool.

2. Pour the distilled water, glycerin and aloe Vera gel into a deep bowl. Then slowly add the cocoa
butter/oil mixture – gradually – into the oil/glycerin/aloe Vera mixture.

3. Beat all of the ingredients thoroughly using a wire whisk.

4. Add this mixture gradually to the water, pouring and beating until all the ingredients are blended into the water.

4. Stir in 3 drops of jasmine essential oil.

5. Pour the body lotion into a pretty container. Store this container in a cool and dark area. Enjoy doves!

I hope you enjoyed learning about this special homemade beauty recipe; 'Cleopatra Jasmine Body Lotion!

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Thursday, October 8, 2009

Can a Woman Be Feminine and Strong? Does Feminine = Weak?

Can a woman be feminine and strong? Does feminine = weak? You bet she can be strong, and you may be surprised by how strong she can actually be! And, no, feminine does NOT mean weak. A very common misconception is that to be a feminine woman, even a girly type of woman, you can’t be possibly have a 'strong' character and presence. Wrong.

This is a fallacy. The gender trait of femininity is so stereotyped, as well as misunderstood by the ignorant and misinformed, that it makes me almost want to shout from the rooftops or something about the ridiculousness of it all. Weakness definitely isn't a part of being feminine doves. I’d also like to add that being a strong feminine woman doesn’t mean we have to act (or look) like men! As women we were never supposed to be looking like or imitating men either.

There are MANY strong, courageous, assertive and very tenacious feminine women out there, who have learnt how to self-direct themselves (better than any CEO could probably do) in their own lives. They not only know how to deal with the easy times, but with the tough times as well - with strength, capability and fortitude - yet with FEMININITY AND GRACE.

A feminine and strong woman certainly does has fears (like we all do,) yet she’s willing to find a way to defeat those fears and not allow these fears to take control of her. In the book 'Fascinating Womanhood,' Helen Andelin calls this 'The Sweet Promise.'

A feminine and strong woman has learnt to put her fear behind her. When put to the test in an emergency, she simply focuses on her feminine strengths and capabilities, instead of worrying obsessively about what could go wrong. She also knows that the majority of things that we fear will rarely come to pass anyway ;-)

Many of us life coaches tell you that you should ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’ Or; ‘do the very thing you fear.’ This is sound advice. And, a strong and feminine woman actually possesses an iron fist in a very soft and velvety glove - and even though she's perfectly strong and capable in looking after herself, she's still feminine enough to do it in a feminine manner - and to want a man in her life.

In addition, a feminine, yet strong women understands a man's psyche better than anyone, and also what he NEEDS in a woman. She also knows how to awaken her man's sense of tenderness, protection and chivalry towards her (something that men SO want to be able to portray.) A man is physically stronger than a woman after all! Moreover, a man's nature is often more firm and decisive than a woman's while women have a tendency to vacillate or waver a bit.

And, what about those particular feminine and strong women (single, widowed etc,) who can bravely step up to the front to ‘fight the good fight,’ rather than stepping back in defeat whenever difficulty or adversity comes their way? These are the women who keep reminding themselves that they can handle a lot more than they think, and even if fear does manage to creep into their minds, they’re able to keep things in perspective and balance their fears against their underlying sense of feminine confidence and faith.

There are plenty of feminine women who are strong, capable and tenacious – who dare to take the necessary risks that one normally wouldn’t want to have to take! Take the Bible’s ‘great’ strong women for example (such as the widow of Zarephath - Elijah’s mother - Abigail, Hannah or Deborah…. ) Now, THEY were strong and capable women - as well as amazing women of faith.

It’s ok to be afraid sometimes, and there’s actually a thing called ‘healthy fear’ which can actually save our life. The real problem is that a woman needs to put healthy fear in its rightful place and place unhealthy fear far behind her!

*Tip; When we remember that fear is simply a feeling, it loses so much of its power. A feeling can't really harm you, and apart from a truly threatening situation, a woman can choose to ignore her fear and take a step forward anyway.

Sometimes in our lives, we experience discomfort, difficulty, adversity and so on. In fact, everybody goes through some hard times don’t they? Moreover, there are many feminine and strong women who are more than willing to accept these discomforts etc, and find a way to tackle and surmount them. They have also learnt to accept the things that they can’t change, as well as the things that they have no control over.

If you we weigh the pros and cons in any situation, we may recognize that the possibility of failure or negative consequences is minimal. Yet, we should never be reckless with our decision-making, but rather empower ourselves by knowing when a fear is groundless. A strong and feminine woman will also feel highly motivated to accept responsibility for her choices and actions too, while reviewing them - and by using what she learns to learn to quickly move forward.

Ignore the ignorant and misinformed doves; you CAN be pretty, girly and feminine, AND a strong, capable and powerful woman too ;-) I hope you enjoyed my article; 'Can a woman be feminine and strong? Does feminine = weak?'

Related articles;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2008/09/why-feminine-woman-is-strong-as-well-as.html

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/07/joys-of-fascinating-womanhood.html

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/05/mastering-feminine-art.html

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2008/11/become-more-feminine-woman-as-strong-as.html

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Sunday, October 4, 2009

Filipina Women - Pinays - Why Western Men Desire, Want and Are Looking For Filipinas

(¯`v´¯)
`*.¸.*´
¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨)
¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ The Truth and Real Reasons Why Men Are So Fascinated By Filipina Women - 'Pinays'¸¸.•¨¯`•

It’s a fact that many western men want, are looking for and are attracted to Filipina women - ‘Pinays.’ Due to the Filipinas’ unique type of femininity and desirability, I’ve known quite a few men who’ve been seriously looking for Filipina girlfriend - or a Filipina bride to love and marry! It’s also well known that Westerner-Filipina marriages are more successful than Westerner-Westerner marriages – with a lower divorce rate.

Just like my views on Russian women, I believe that Filipino women have just as many admirable qualities, as well as wonderful, feminine and altruistic attributes going for them. Moreover, this is exactly what many Western men are looking for. Filipinas are very ideal girlfriend and wife material too - and any sane masculine men would virtually be lapping up a Filipina’s caring and generous ways!

In addition, I’ve had quite a few happy-go-lucky and charming Filipina friends over the years and can vouch for their wonderful and vibrant personalities, as well as their quite unique female characteristics. I’ve also not met a Filipina yet, that didn’t make me feel most welcome in her home. They’re also generally very warm, friendly and hospitable ladies.

Not only that, but they truly can be a JOY to be around, and the littlest of things can really ‘set them off’ into a rather hysterical fit of giggles - and the silliest and most unexpected things imaginable will really amuse them (just like myself at times!) And, in a group of women that can be really quite refreshing to witness.

And, as an expert on femininity, I can also vouch that ‘Pinays’ are one of the most FEMININE groups of ladies alive! Their feminine natures surpass many non-traditional Western women in the sense that they can be quite reverent towards their men and are willing and able to let a man be a MAN. I can certainly see why many Western men are so attracted and charmed by the Filipinas!

I’d also like to add that I’m well aware of many Western peoples rather cynical or negative views of Filipina (and also Russian women,) and how they think that most Filipina women who marry Western men are automatically ‘gold diggers’ or just looking for a ticket out of poverty. I think such generalizations are not only ignorant, but rather judgmental and cruel. For my personal views on this opinion, please read my post;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2008/10/why-men-are-so-attracted-to-foreign.html

Now let’s look at the ideal qualities and attributes of Filipina girls and women – Pinays – and determine their secrets. And, what Western men find so attractive, fascinating and desirable about them;

1. Filipina Beauty and Sensuality

Well, for a start, many Filipinas are petite, delicate looking and rather ‘doll-like.’ This naturally brings out a real contrast between themselves and the men. Moreover, many Filipina girls and women have gorgeous manes of hair and appear quite sensual and womanly. They’re often dainty in mannerisms and age very well. They also take pride in the way they look, as well as in the way they dress.

Also, Filipinas are renowned world-wide by men for their unique type of feminine exotic beauty (being a rather exotic mixture of Asian, Spanish and Malaysian heredity.) Most Filipina girls and women also favor keeping their hair LONG (which men prefer) - and looking like a woman should!

2. Filipinas’ Femininity

Pinay girls and women are generally known to be traditionally feminine and EASY to be with; patient, modest and humble. Most are softly spoken and submissive too. In addition, many Pinay girls and women are tranquil, gentle, compassionate, respectful, supportive and understanding.

On the whole, Filipinas are also far less aggressive, as well as less demanding than those ‘modern feminist’ kinds of women. They usually have a quite calm and relaxed temperament as well. Luckily for them, the feminist ‘anti-male’ agenda hasn’t ruined their God-given femininity or womanhood - and let’s hope it never does! As we know, a Feminine woman is exactly the best and most IDEAL kind of girlfriend or wife that a man could have!

3. Filipina Cheerfulness and Optimism

I can also tell you that Filipina girls and women are amongst the most happy, optimistic and cheerful ladies on earth! You’ll find that they’re quite entertaining too and usually have a terrific sense of humor. In addition, they love to joke, chatter amiably and have a lot of fun. And, you rarely ever see an unhappy or depressed Filipina woman!

Even a Filipina friend told me that in the Philippines, the land of Tagalog, smiles and fiestas, you RARELY ever witness depression. Because of their contented natures and ideal disposition, it’s really no wonder then that many men idealize them as a pleasure to be with ;-)

4. Filipina Women’s Traditional Ways, Modesty and Family Values

Besides embracing their femininity, Filipina women have those lovely, old fashioned and traditional family values that sadly are not anywhere near as common in Western society. I tell you doves, many Western men are quite disheartened and disillusioned by the lack of these values in Western women.

As for Filipinas, they're mostly traditional, marry early and are sexually modest before marriage. And, once married, family comes ahead of career. Even so, many Filipinas still manage to find their own little place under the sun!

Ideologically, Pinays aren’t just loyal and accommodating, but quite conservative. In fact, family and home means everything to them! They often make the most wonderful mothers too – and literally devote themselves to their children’s (and husband’s) well-being and happiness.

A family-oriented Filipina woman would never, ever abandon her children, and would never dream of putting her parent/s into a nursing home.

5. The Filipina’s Home Life

Filipinas are organized, flexible and willing to sacrifice. As a homemaker, they’re more domesticated than most other women too. Just like traditionally feminine Western women, they may want to do almost everything and is quite the ‘domestic queen.’ Not only that, but they cook delicious meals each day and take a lot of pride and care in their homes.

6. Filipinas on Love and Marriage

Unlike the overly-independent and liberal type of woman, a Pinay believes in and wants a loving and traditional marriage! She wants a knight in shining armor who’ll make her feel protected and secure. Filipina girls and women are, in some men's minds, the most sweet, affectionate, passionate and loving women in the world. They definitely know how to make a man feel respected, needed and admired - like a REAL man!

Pinays are also renowned to make a real effort in pleasing and catering to their husbands. As women of substance, marriage is not only considered to sacred to the usual Filipina wife, but a permanent, life-long commitment. In fact, divorce is rarely considered.

7. Filipina’s Faith and Spiritual Life

Most Filipinas are spiritually inclined and have a strong faith in God. Generally, they also have a good sense of morality and values. In fact, most Filipinas would avoid like the plague doing anything that could bring shame upon them or their family!

As a very ‘collective’ type of woman, a Filipina almost reverently takes care of her loved ones and is rarely materialistic like so many in the West. Gaining material possessions just isn’t considered to be a major priority in life.

8. Filipina Strength and Determination

Pinays are quite determined little creatures, as well as very resourceful and hard working! Like the ‘Southern Belle,’ even though these women are usually soft and gentle on the surface, they often have a very strong interior. Their tenacity often astounds me and many seem to have a secret reserve of energy stashed away for when they really need it.

And, even though after marriage, most Filipina women choose to stay home to take care of the husband and family, many are still willing to help support the family financially (if absolutely necessary.)

9. The Filipina’s Intelligence and the Importance of Education

Pinays are also intelligent and generally well-educated women – a college education being vitally important in the modern Philippine culture.

10. The Filipina Woman Dating

When dating, a Filipina girl or woman takes it slow and LOVES to play hard to get – which they call ‘pakipot!’ This is because playing hard to get is understood to be a very useful tactic for a Filipina, as well as the most sensible road to take!

Filipinas wisely look for the evidence of a man’s feelings, as well as proof of sincerity, and know that by that playing hard to get, they get to really test out a man’s level of interest
;-)

I hope you enjoyed reading my post; 'Filipina Women - Pinays - Why Western Men Desire, Want and Are Looking For Filipinas.'

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Friday, October 2, 2009

Protein Reconstructor Treatments for Strong and Beautiful Hair

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Getting Beautiful, Strong and 'healthy' Hair is Essential For a Feminine Woman!

Hydrolyzed keratin protein reconstructor treatments are perfectly ideal for achieving strong and beautiful hair. They really can help keep the hair strong, resilient, as well as pliable. Did you know that our hair is entirely made up of protein? This hair protein is called ‘keratin’ (this keratin is also the same protein that forms our fingernails.) Also, keratin protein actually comprises of many single chemical units known as ‘amino acids’ - which are essential to the hair.

If our hair doesn't have enough of this keratin or amino acids (being depleted or lost by environmental conditions, combing, washing, towel drying/blow drying, flat ironing/curling, coloring/perming/permanent straightening, as well as from the use of certain styling aids and products, this loss not only weakens or breaks the individual hairs, but the hair overall becomes porous. It also isn't able to retain moisture anymore. Protein loss in the hair also incites moisture loss!

Doves, all that daily wear and tear (weathering) on our hair certainly leaves its mark - even if it isn’t visible to the naked eye! However, if you put some of your hair under a microscope you’d certainly see small cavities, chips and cracks all along the hair shaft, lots of damaged and missing cuticles (from the top of the hair all the way down to the ends of the hair.) Perhaps there would even be thinning, breakage, tears and split ends.

This is where protein reconstructor treatments come in, as they have the ability to fill in and adhere to the cracks of the hair, temporarily bond to them, as well as penetrate the cortex of the hair. Yet, the protein treatment you use must be the hydrolyzed type of protein – which has a low enough molecular weight to penetrate the hair shaft.

Any other type of non-hydrolyzed protein, or natural protein sources such as egg or yogurt etc, contain individual molecules that are far too big to ever be able to penetrate the hair shaft. Only the very small, perfectly sized fragments of hydrolyzed hair protein will ever be able to do this.

So, any other source of protein is not effective to be ‘absorbed’ into your hair and do much good. Interestingly, some women also apply soy sauce or amino acid treatments on their hair at home (‘Bragg’s Liquid Aminos’ being popular.) Unfortunately, this is not effective either because the amino acids in these products are far too tiny and soluble, so definitely not suitable for adhering to the hair. And, as soon as you’d rinse it off, probably most of it would wash right off and be going back down the drain.

Speaking of things rinsing off, even though hydrolyzed protein is ‘attracted’ to the hair and will deposit itself in the regions of porosity and damage due to it’s low molecular structure, it will still rinse off the hair eventually - in fact rather quickly. So, it’s NOT a permanent ‘fix’ for damaged hair/split ends (permanently fixing or restoring the hair is scientifically impossible once the hair has been damaged.) And, you must apply protein to your hair regularly to maintain the desired result.

Also, some women find that protein treatments make their hair feel stiff, hard, brittle or ‘crunchy’ after using them, so following the protein treatment, the very important step of moisturizing the hair with a good conditioner may be essential to restore moisture, softness and pliability.

Additionally, applying some heat (no more than 150 degrees) could help to achieve a more substantial bonding between the hydrolyzed protein and your hair (though this may depend on the brand and the way it was manufactured, so please read the label to make sure.) However, if the ingredients in the product would actually clash or react unfavorably with heat (especially at higher temperatures,) you risk destroying and literally MELTING the natural protein in your hair!

And, as I mentioned previously, protein reconstructor treatments only have a temporary benefit, and must be repeated to maintain the benefit. In addition, the only way that you can permanently fix such hair is to CUT off all the damage!

Importantly, when selecting a good protein treatment for the hair, it should have on the label, hydrolyzed protein displayed as being one of the first five ingredients. The further a listed ingredient happens to be towards the end of an ingredient list, the less effective it actually is. In fact, the ingredients after the first five-10 on the list, are often so minimal as to be almost negligible - and are just added for making the product look better.

There are several kinds of hydrolyzed protein products; keratin (derived from human hair/animal hair or sheep’s wool,) collagen (derived from various animal products such as hooves, hides etc,) as well as silk, vegetable and wheat.

There are also many different brands of ‘deep’ conditioning treatments that contain hydrolyzed protein – which in the right Ph, molecular weight and balance can can penetrate all 3 layers of the hair. Hydrolyzed human hair keratin is the most ideal and potent protein as it is an exact match for the keratin in our own hair.

Here are two excellent hydrolyzed hair protein products that have the protein included in the top five ingredients;

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ApHogee Two-Step Protein treatment (hydrolyzed protein is the second ingredient after water and it dries rock hard on the hair, before rinsing out and balancing with a conditioner.)

Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ Megatek Rebuilder (very protein rich treatment made for improving horses manes, but it’s wonderful, as well as safe for humans to use too ;-) And, again, hydrolyzed protein is the second ingredient.)

*Tip; when applying your desired protein treatment, make sure you have first wet your hair, then divide your hair into sections, taking your time to apply the solution all throughout your hair – avoiding the scalp area.

I bet some of you are also wondering how long does hair absorb conditioner for? Well, 5 to 10 minutes is enough for a conditioner/protein treatment to do its very ‘best’ job, for according to trichologists, any longer is POINTLESS (and probably a waste of time,) and will have no extra effect at all. Hair simply doesn’t absorb conditioner in the way we think!

In addition to using protein reconstructor treatments and conditioners, it’s also a wise idea to include plenty of protein rich food in your daily diet. It’s known that a diet that’s too low in protein can cause a retardation of hair growth, as well as thinning and hair fall.

Very good food sources of protein include; lean red meat, chicken, liver, fish, eggs, legumes, wheat germ, granulated lecithin, yogurt, cheese, seeds, nuts and soy products such as tofu, miso and soy sauce. Besides, ‘strengthening’ your hair, these foods could also be responsible for stimulating hair growth.

Related articles;

Coconut oil that can actually penetrate and moisturize the hair;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/03/hair-conditioning-oil-that-actually.html

The 'conditioner only' hair washing method;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/09/co-hair-washing-method-for-beautiful.html

If you want to check out my beauty book that shares with you even more secrets to getting a beautiful and healthy crowning glory of hair, click here; The Feminine Art of Beauty Book

You may also be interested in;

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

'CO Hair Washing Method' for Beautiful and Healthy Hair

The 'Conditioner Only Method' (Washing Your Hair Without shampoo) - A 'Best Kept Secret' For Having Beautiful and Healthy Hair

It’s a fact that without a fine head of hair – hair that’s thick, shiny and strong - a woman can’t really feel beautiful. Attractive facial features, combined with a crowning glory of beautiful, hair is a dream of many women.

Moreover, less-than-perfect facial features can be redeemed by a beautiful, healthy and luscious head of hair. I have known plenty of ‘plain’ women who have attracted the eyes and admiration of many men, simply by showcasing their long and gorgeous heads of hair!

I know that most women take a fair bit of pride in their appearance - though sometimes we do need to be reminded of the importance of hair as a chief ornament in our overall beauty. It’s also every feminine woman’s business to be informed of the very best means of cultivating, as well as preserving a long and luxurious growth of hair.

Admittedly, with a lack of the right knowledge, this isn’t always easy to achieve (I go into a lot more detail about proper hair care and how to get a gorgeous head of hair in my book 'The Feminine Art of Beauty.') I have always loved 'best kept secrets' and this book is full of them ;-)

As women, we do need to take quite special care of our hair – especially if we color, chemically process or use HEAT on our hair. Hair ‘left to itself’ will virtually revenge itself on you – never forget that! It’s definitely in the power of most women to have a good head of hair. But such an attribute can only be enjoyed by taking certain efforts, as well as knowing the best and most effective haircare products to use - and paying constant attention to our hair’s growth and preservation!

You need to also know that the habit of frequently shampooing the hair is destructive to its beauty. Most commercial shampoos are in actual fact very DETRIMENTAL to the hair! Most contain sodium lauryl sulfate/sodium laureth sulfate and ammonium lauryl sulfate, which are extremely harsh and drying detergents. They not only over-cleanse the scalp, but can really dry it out, causing dandruff. The harsh chemicals in certain shampoos will also strip the overall hair of its natural oils.

Over time your hair will also just keep getting dryer if you continue to wash your hair in any brand of shampoo that contains these harmful ingredients. And, to compensate for being stripped of oil, the scalp may also start to produce even more oil than it originally did (sebum.) It can become a vicious cycle doves; the more you shampoo your hair, the oilier it actually gets!

To get beautiful and healthy, as well as shiny and lustrous hair, you should also avoid shampoos containing parabens or mineral oils as these ingredients cover the hair shaft with a FILM that actually prevents conditioners, protein treatments etc, to be able to penetrate the cuticles of the hair.

A friend I know has the most beautiful and lustrous head of long hair. Though she colors her hair, she avoids washing it with shampoo more than once a week. Even though she only washes her hair once a week, she does have an oily scalp. To rectify this, she’s made a practice of thoroughly cleansing her scalp every morning with a damp sponge. The solution she uses to cleanse her scalp has conditioner, lemon juice, lavender and rosemary essential oils. This is actually a unique form of the conditioner only 'CO' hair washing method'

To cleanse her scalp, she first puts her hair into a loose braid and simply sponges the scalp cleansing solution over her scalp areas, being careful to keep the mid lengths and ends dry. This solution rectifies her oily scalp while leaving the rest of her hair alone. Then she bends over a sink to rinse it off after a few minutes. though she doesn't have oily hair at all - like some of us I may add ;-)

Other women will cleanse the scalp and do a conditioner only wash, by leaning over the bath or bathroom sink, wetting the top of the scalp and then applying the conditioner. They will massage the conditioner into the scalp a bit, and leave it on the scalp for a about 10 minutes. Then, they'll bend over again to rinse it out- allowing the water to run off the front of their head. Other ingenious women use jugs or spray bottles to do a CO scalp wash.

Doves, conditioner alone IS suitable for cleaning and washing the scalp (the conditioner only hair washing method) if you don't have predominately oily hair. It’s also suitable to use this method as a hair washing alternative in the shower (as long as you don’t use lots of styling product in your hair.) Hair conditioner not only contains alcohol, but the ingredients glycerin or glycerol, which are actually able to dissolve and dissipate the sebum on your scalp.

Being a lot gentler than detergent-based shampoo, conditioner will admittedly take longer to cleanse the scalp than shampoo does, so you’ll need leave it on your scalp for about 10-15 minutes before rinsing it off. However, using conditioner only definitely DOES work. And, it's wonderful for curly, frizzy and 'nappy' hair too!

*Tip; don’t forget to rub your scalp with the pads of the fingers like you’d do with shampoo to wash your hair. You should also condition the rest of your hair, as you normally do. Though, once a week, you may need to do a normal shampoo wash in the shower, massaging your scalp with the pads of your fingers to dislodge any skin flakes, dust and those random white particles that naturally appear on the scalp.

Another good tip for keeping the hair clean and free of dust and debris, is to give it a thorough
brushing with a natural bristle brush. A bonus is that this will also help distribute the scalps natural oils throughout the hair which helps keep it conditioned and glossy – also the look of beautiful and healthy hair :-)

If you want to check out my beauty book that shares with you even more secrets to getting a beautiful and healthy crowning glory of hair, click here; The Feminine Art of Beauty Book

You won't be disappointed!

Related article - coconut oil that can penetrate and moisturize the hair;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/03/hair-conditioning-oil-that-actually.html

Hydrolyzed keratin protein for treating, strengthening and beautifying the hair;

http://theartofbeingfeminine.blogspot.com/2009/10/protein-reconstructor-treatments-for.html

You may also be interested in;

Friday, September 18, 2009

The Secret of Being Lucky in Life and in Love

Positive Thinking is On Her Side!

This post will be sharing with you the secret of being lucky in life and in love. In recent posts I’ve spoken about women taking responsibility for their lives, as well as a woman being able to learn from her past mistakes and failures. It's all about being proactive in the way you live your life - and staying positive.

However, for a woman to emerge victoriously from these mistakes, and live a more luscious and fulfilling life, she also has to be positive in her own mind that; ‘I CAN DO IT.’ Moreover, a woman needs to banish from her ‘monkey mind’ the feelings of doubt, which can destroy the most well-meaning intentions, as well as resolutions!

Additionally, to emerge from difficulties, a woman should also avoid all grieving and excessive regret over her past mistakes and failures.

Instead, she could say to herself; "It’s true that I made mistakes and failed in that particular endeavor. But from this moment on, I promise myself to only ever think about it just to remind myself of the REASON WHY I failed.”

This is a far healthier way of thinking, as well as processing such life scenarios, yes? It's much better for a woman to analyze these sorts of things calmly, while she recognizes the mistakes she's made and see where she was actually ‘in the wrong.

Then she can take a private note of it, and regularly remind herself of what she has learned. Under similar future circumstances, she’ll have a very good chance of avoiding repeating the same mistakes!

In addition, making the statements; "I always fail,” or “I never have any luck" should be erased completely from the vocabulary of a woman who desires competency, as well as personal power.

The simple thought, "I will succeed," is also the secret of being lucky in life and in love. Success thinking also creates the conditions for achieving personal power and success. A 'high-status' woman will regularly and often pronounce these kinds of affirmative thoughts to herself - with an attitude of absolute
belief ;-)

**She can and DOES achieve most of the goals in her life. She’s also extremely determined to employ every legitimate means so as to reach that particular end!

The most competent and successful woman has to be very determined too, and has the type of female mind that’s constantly seeking new ideas (and will use those ideas that seem better than her own.) She also has the type of mind that calculates and reasons, and finally lays down a good plan - and can’t be diverted from her plan! Naturally, she experiences ‘all kinds of awesomeness’ in her life!

Remember; only a 'low status' and pessimistic person complains often of having ‘bad luck’ (I also believe that it‘s a poor excuse in which only the weak indulge.) In addition, a low-status person's aversion towards being proactive in any sort of self-improvement, as well as a natural loathing of making any kind of EFFORT, and there’s really nothing they can really do to succeed in life anyway!

‘Unlucky’ women are always complaining of the injustice of their bad luck too, without stopping to think that they themselves have been the direct cause of their failures. Furthermore, by constantly complaining about their lives, these women gradually become fully absorbed in the negative idea of suffering eternal bad luck, which ends up becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy for them.

I’ll also add; that in thinking and acting in such a negative way, pessimistic individuals always manage to provoke the ‘hostile’ and invisible forces which are dormant in everything.

Moreover, the negative forces of the law of attraction always seems to array themselves more readily against a NEGATIVE man or woman – and it doesn’t help that they usually have a complete lack of resolution to try and combat their difficulties - or cultivate the determination to overcome them for that matter.

Remember doves; the most attractive, admirable and competent women are brave, strong, proactive and positive – no matter what the ‘odds’ seem to be!

There's the REAL secret of being lucky in life and in
love ;-)

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